*please forgive the quality (02:39-11:54) We made it y’all! We survived 2020 and we are manifesting great things for 2021! Today we have some things get off our chest regarding New Years resolutions and social media validation (09:14). Is $600 enough stimulus for you or is it an insult? (14:01) This week we’re running through some ‘What Would You Do’ scenarios covering topics like marriage, sex, cheating, murder, loyalty & a lot more! Let us know what would you do (21:30)! If your sibling was cheating on your best friend, would you tell your best friend? If you have a question to ask us please use this link to send some spicy stuff anonymously: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSebwcH-zavRYLwvOO6Gq3tv7CmrkkqRF9Cj5uRdqENiR42MVA/viewform Tell a friend to tell a friend! Be sure to leave a RATING/REVIEW on Apple Podcast! Thanks for listening ! FOLLOW ME ON INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/justin_alzi/ FOLLOW THE PODCAST PAGE: https://www.instagram.com/polaroppositespod/ FOLLOW DONTÉ: https://www.instagram.com/_donnie_f/ If you would like a question answered on air, email us! We want to hear your feedback and offer advice on your situation! Ask away! polaropposites.pod@gmail.com
*please forgive the quality (02:39-11:54)
We made it y’all! We survived 2020 and we are manifesting great things for 2021! Today we have some things get off our chest regarding New Years resolutions and social media validation (09:14). Is $600 enough stimulus for you or is it an insult? (14:01) This week we’re running through some ‘What Would You Do’ scenarios covering topics like marriage, sex, cheating, murder, loyalty & a lot more! Let us know what would you do (21:30)! If your sibling was cheating on your best friend, would you tell your best friend?
If you have a question to ask us please use this link to send some spicy stuff anonymously:
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSebwcH-zavRYLwvOO6Gq3tv7CmrkkqRF9Cj5uRdqENiR42MVA/viewform
Tell a friend to tell a friend! Be sure to leave a RATING/REVIEW on Apple Podcast! Thanks for listening !
FOLLOW ME ON INSTAGRAM:
https://www.instagram.com/justin_alzi/
FOLLOW THE PODCAST PAGE:
https://www.instagram.com/polaroppositespod/
FOLLOW DONTÉ:
https://www.instagram.com/_donnie_f/
If you would like a question answered on air, email us! We want to hear your feedback and offer advice on your situation! Ask away! polaropposites.pod@gmail.com
Speaker 0 (0s): Welcome. Welcome
Speaker 1 (14s): To another episode of the show. It's ME Justin and we are back with another episode or something smells a little bit different this week, but I'll talk about that later in a second. But if you guys are new to the show, the show is all about bringing together different perspectives. We agree, we disagree, but most importantly, we come together to discuss topics relating to entertainment, pop culture, politics, all of it. We love to have good conversations on this show and we love discussing things that we feel. People don't discuss enough.
That's the point of the show. And that's why I hope you guys keep coming back, but happy new year to everybody. I hope you are. New Year is going well. I hope your resolutions are checked off and you're ready to go. 20, 21. We'll be an interesting Year, but let's hope its more positive than 2020. I'm looking forward to all of it this year. We'll bring in, I can't wait for you all to get into this show. So with that being said, make sure you're subscribed. Makes sure to tell a friend to tell a friend and make sure you follow the show as well. All of the links to follow me or in the description are the links to follow.
The show are in the description. And if you want to send in an anonymous question today as your day, click the link in the bio. So if you have a question or a concern as scenario or anything that you want us to discuss on the show, you have free reign to type whatever you want anonymously. And we will read it on air. So with that being said, the smell is a little bit different because you're a boy. Dante is joining the show this week and not just this week, but it seems like Dante is going to be a permanent addition to the show.
We love to see it. So if you guys have been listening for the past few weeks, he's been on the show consecutively for I believe 10 plus episodes. So like I said, in last week's episode, I decided to give it a trial run. So I was like, you know what? Come on for this internship. We'll test you out. We'll give you a different things to do. And he proved himself. So I'm happy to announce that Dante formerly known as Do Prix is now a permanent addition to the show.
Speaker 0 (2m 17s): Yeah.
Speaker 2 (2m 18s): Yes. Thank you guys are giving you a behind the curtain sneak peek. I'm just really happy to be here with you guys. And I wouldn't be here without you guys, right? Like if Justin and I did this, you know, we did a couple of episodes and everybody's like, Oh, I'm not really feeling it, Justin, you got to get that guy that the hell off your Podcast he's too problematic. He is whack, whatever it may be. Right. But that did not happen. You know, the feedback has been overwhelmingly positive and overwhelmingly supportive. The people that have listened to me or my old Podcast came over here and supported me.
The Polar Opposites family before I joined, has been supportive of me and supportive of the work that Justin and I are doing.
Speaker 3 (3m 0s): One of the things that I said to myself, When no ME and Justin agree to do the internship things. And Eric was when we saw that it was like, I want to make meaningful content, right? Like I don't want to talk about, you know, like eating ass and just shit that Dont, that don't affect, you know, people's lives or don't get the conversation started or you don't have any meaning behind it. Like, I can't tell you how many people have told me, like, Hey, this is a lot deeper, more high-minded conversation. And what I heard you have before and you know, there's a time and place for everything like what we did and then it was fun.
It was fun. I had a good time. It definitely put in that time, it makes you better at what you do. So I think that it made me a better person to be on this podcast. But you know, Justin brings out a, a side of me, you know, when we worked together that it is great, you know, and I enjoy the conversation. I enjoy the feedback that everybody is giving me. So we are here. This is for all of our offices. Now
Speaker 1 (3m 59s): We're here, we're here to do it. That was well said. Honestly, I agree with everything that you said. And I will say though, you know, initially I did not want to work with anybody. Dante will tell you that I was like, you know what? Everything is working fine. If it's not broke, don't fix it. But 20, 21 and just 2020 in general taught me to take risks and to listen and to have people around you that will give you the truth. So everybody has like a circle of friends that they go to, that they trust that it will tell them what it is.
So I ask them to like, Hey, you pay attention to these episodes. What do you think? And I also listened to you guys as well. Your feedback was really important. So this is not ever something Ross. And I'm like, you know what? I like him. I'm just going to add them to the show. I really gave a lot of thought into it. And I'm happy that he's going to be joining ME from week to week is exciting and I'm happy. And I'm looking forward to everything that we're going to do. Going forward. You all are in for some good stuff. You all are in for some reason.
Speaker 3 (4m 59s): Let me just interrupt for a second. So I know a lot of you guys are going to be like, Oh, so like do pre why are you going by Dante now? Like I'm going by, you know, my given name. Cause I stand behind everything and I say on here, it is what it is like, you can call me Dante, you can call me Donnie, whatever you want. That is going to be the name moving forward. We have so much content for you guys lined up. We have a whole shared notes section in our I-phones and we have so many topics listed out for you guys are on top of this stuff that happens, you know, on an everyday basis, the breaking news of the day and everything like that.
So we got y'all covered. Thanks again for supporting us. Tell a friend to tell a friend, if you enjoy it, tell somebody about word of mouth is still the strongest type of marketing out there. Like Justin said, there's going to be a lot of stuff coming to you. 2021, that we are excited to talk to you guys about limit. Let us know to have you guys to be interested in some t-shirts because I know y'all Pete, the new artwork here, just, it just let us know. We got, we have a lot of stuff to cook and, and percolate and out there we do do, we've been working
Speaker 1 (5m 58s): On it behind the scene stuff. Where are you guys always moving on silent? That's my motto for life. And that's my model for the Podcast as well. But that is his government name. You know, it's real when he's using his government name. So we are serious, But this is a celebration, a celebration wouldn't be complete without some vows. Dante, are you ready? I'm ready. Okay. Repeat after me. I don't know
Speaker 3 (6m 24s): A doctor. They take you Justin this guy's crazy. There's some place that's completely out of left field. I did not. I did not see that coming. We didn't discuss that. You know? That's good. Listen, you guys along with, Justin have my word. I ain't turning my back on yo you know, as polar opposites for a reason, we do not want to agree on everything.
The conversation is might get tense, but they, at the end of the day, this man has my friend who is never going to come to her. Like, Hey, fuck him type thing, because we're mature, intelligent adults. We could have a conversation or disagree, agree to disagree, move past it and still talk behind the scenes. There was a lot of times that we talk after all our episode was like, damn, I wish I would have said that or all right, you have a point on that. I made sure that when we record, I'm going to let people know that you were right about this. I got you. All right. Let's let's get this. You guys like you guys are what makes us who are Opposites.
Speaker 1 (7m 29s): Yeah, honestly, it's you guys, you guys are the reason why we do it.
Speaker 3 (7m 33s): Exactly. We went and do it for the people that are in like it, or if a brand wasn't a struggle because I told you about the listener Matt, before we try to double that this year. So let's get it.
Speaker 1 (7m 42s): Yeah. Well Dante, you finish the vows.
Speaker 3 (7m 47s): All right. Yeah. I got to take you Justin is a huge Justin to be my unlawfully Join and Podcast partner. So it would be more fully joined PODCAST partner through the good times and bad with a good time is going to bed and Corona and in health Corona. I know I don't want to do the show anymore. Amen. Till I don't want to do the show anymore. Let's get some free music playing as well.
Speaker 1 (8m 18s): With that being said, y'all know what is going to be happening from now on. We have some things to talk about. So it's the new year. This is the first episode of the New Year again. Happy new year too. You guys listening? Dante. I wanted to wish you a happy Kwanzaa.
Speaker 3 (8m 32s): I appreciate that. My good brother, happy Kwanzaa. Happy Hanukkah to everybody out there. You know Festivus winter solstice, whatever you celebrate, just celebrate. Be happy. Be in a good mood. I'm all about the power of positivity. ON
Speaker 1 (8m 46s): Well, this is the first episode of the New Year so a New Year wouldn't be complete without us getting some things off our chest. So let's get into off my chest. Justin's got a gig.
Speaker 4 (9m 1s): Justin's got to get some fucking shit
Speaker 1 (9m 9s): Oh, right? So this is a new year. I have some things to get off my chest and my off my chest this week actually has to do with new year's. So a new year comes by every single year and a lot of people make new year's resolutions, right? We love to see you. You might want to lose weight. You want to eat healthy. You have things that you want to accomplish. And that's a great, the thing I need to get off my chest. There's this idea that you have to wait until January to accomplish the things that you are looking forward to. I say that the new year's resolution can happen every day.
It can happen weekly. It can happen every month. You don't have to wait until it's a whole new leaf to start accomplishing your goals and looking forward to the things that you want to get done. Because I think that a lot of people might just say, Hey, you know, I've been planning to do this, but I'll just wait until January and the New Year and go hard and accomplish my goals. Why start in January? Why don't you start now? Get the things that you want knocked out of the way and see how far you've come when you take your goals seriously and start. Now whether you start it every day or every week or every month, start now accomplish those goals.
And don't wait to the new year because you can have a daily resolutions. You can have a weekly resolution. It doesn't matter. And it doesn't have to be a New Year for you to take your goals. Seriously
Speaker 3 (10m 22s): Support and respect that. Everything you just said, this is the truth, right? Like if you say, Hey, I'm going to wait. Or if it's October, do you say, Hey, I'm going to wait until January to change this around. You've got a couple of months there, buddy. Like if you got to give yourself a week, give yourself a week to prep and plan and get it in the right space mentally. But you can always make a change always
Speaker 1 (10m 40s): Because a lot of people start gym memberships in January. And then in March, they're a gym membership has no more. So it's funny, but you know, take it seriously too.
Speaker 3 (10m 49s): THE don't waste time. If this year. It should show you anything as that time was very limited. I would play around with waste of time. Anybody who know me know like, ah, fuck around wasting time. Don't waste my time. That makes me angry. I do not waste my time. I'm too old for an issue. You can get it back.
Speaker 1 (11m 3s): That's true. That's true, Dante, what do you need to get off your chest this week?
Speaker 3 (11m 8s): So what I want to get off my chest, the way that I see people determine their self worth based off of social media. This is an attack on you ladies, but you are the people that are the offenders of this. Most often, I see girls post a picture on Instagram. It doesn't get the amount of likes that they want. So they delete it and post it again a couple of days later, why are you getting some ice? Double-tap in the phone to determine what you think about yourself. To me, that's insanity. You should know. Or yes, you should know who you are, what you bring to the table, but you stand on and love yourself, regardless of what are some strangers or people that you haven't seen in.
Years thank because I won't ask you that you put some of the people that have double-tap in the early people that have to go scroll in the past that they probably don't give a fuck about you. You know? Like honestly
Speaker 2 (11m 54s): Like, well, if you break it down, they probably, you don't really care about You like they would show up at your funeral. If you need it, if you need a $20, they probably wouldn't give it to you. So what do you care for? Like, who are you flexing for it? And if you break down the numbers, have it, lets say you have a thousand followers, you post a picture and it gets a, a, a hundred likes, like, all right, cool. One and 10 people that scroll past it liked it. Like what you're playing the law of average is here. So what is that magic number or what is that percentage that makes you feel worthy I guess is what I'm asking because it's just ridiculous, man, like stop fishing, but you don't get your self confidence from social media, stop fishing for approval in confidence, from social media to learn to love yourself.
Speaker 1 (12m 40s): That's that's a good off my chest, but I think it's important because a lot of people place their value or their worth and to social media. I think that it comes with maturity when you grow up and realize that social media is not real life. What do you see is fake? There is a lot of people flexing holding racks of a a hundred dollars bills. Like they're rich. It's an insecurity thing. Maybe the people that take it seriously are the ones that are the most insecure. If you're really that rich, would you be posting it for everybody to see? That's why a lot of these rappers get robbed, but this is 2021.
So let me like come in with good energy. Since Dante said that I'm the negative one, which I have a gripe with that. That's actually what I need to get off my chest. Dante calling me out of my name last week and saying that I'm the negative one. I'm not a negative. I'm not a negative. I'm not a negative. Don't you ever call me out of my name again?
Speaker 2 (13m 30s): Well, you know what? I'm going to bring something back from the past. Let that hurt go. Cysts. You sound like it. It was a little mad.
Speaker 1 (13m 37s): I'm angry. How dare you assassinate my character.
Speaker 2 (13m 41s): But on a serious note, what you just said about people getting robbed. Listen, we are in the middle of a pandemic. There are a bunch of people are unemployed right now. If you want a flex, all that shit you own and all that, you made yourself a Mark and people will target you. It would be to people, you know? So just take my advice on it. You price, it keeps some things to yourself. What happens at home should stay at home sometimes guys.
Speaker 1 (14m 2s): So in the news this week, the only thing that I guess we care about talking about is this stimulus check. It was announced. They were pushing up against a deadline to approve $600 worth of a relief for people. And I hate the fact that they call it a relief because $600 is not relief. It's not even putting a band-aid on a wound and it might even be sprinkling salt inside the womb. That's not helping anybody. A lot of people I'm being serious and being serious. A lot of people's rent $600 that won't cover it. Like it's nice. It's better than nothing.
So I'm not going to like sit here and bash it completely, but that's not good enough. You know, sometimes we have to do more and a lot of people are hurting and need way more than $600. So with that being said, Trump randomly announced one night that he was appalled at the bill and that instead of 600, they should get 2000 instead. And I was like, okay, that's great. Yeah.
Speaker 5 (14m 54s): President Trump tweeting a Christmas message to Congress from his Florida golf club, give our people the money. The president insistent on $2,000 direct payments that his administration negotiated at $600 and so far or refusing to sign the $2.3 trillion spending and COVID relief bill passed last week without his signature, a programs will start to expire. Today effecting more than 12 million Americans, but that would be a tragedy to the people who are relying on an eviction, moratoriums, unemployment insurance, as so many other things on their scope and bill, we need including money for a vaccine distribution.
Speaker 1 (15m 30s): I'm a realist like I'll applaud Trump if he does something right. And I'll also read him when he does something wrong. This has been a lot more reading on this show than applauding. I'll just say that. But you know, $2,000 is way better than 600. So he came out of the blue and announced that. And I was like, I'm here for that. So it doesn't look like that bill is going to get passed, but he did end up signing the $600 stimulus bill to present a government shutdown. Right?
Speaker 2 (15m 55s): So for people to applaud this guy as some sort of like a hero or something and saying, Hey, the American people deserve $2,000 checks instead of 600, you were a part of these negotiations the whole time. You could have made that your mandate for your party who was followed you off a cliff and on the sink and shit the whole time. And I wanted to clear something up for people. So some people think that like, Hey, their government is giving a free money. This was a radical blah, blah. Actually it's called the stimulus for a reason was for the people who won the people who are hurting or they deserve it.
Right? But you need to pay people that are still working and still earning a living to go out there and spend, because in this economy, people are going to be scared to spend their money and they're going to save it. And the economy goes to a halt and it collapses. So they were putting money in our pockets to make sure that the economy doesn't collapse $600, like its kind of insulting to people that because of COVID haven't been able to work since March or April or may June, July all the months. Right. It was, was that such a a hundred hours we're going to do for him? Or somebody can interpret that and be like, Oh, these guys sound ungrateful. No I don't. I don't think any of those people that have that opinion or on grateful is kind of like a slap in the face.
Like, okay, cool. I lost my job due to COVID the government's fucked up. Don't care about us. My mortgage is $1,500 a month. It's a $600 a month to do like it. It's sad at this point, you know, for a dollar 69 a day, you could sponsor an American citizen. So that's where we're at right now.
Speaker 1 (17m 20s): It's true.
Speaker 2 (17m 21s): You know, people make fun of that song and tie it back to that, that, that commercial with the dogs and shit, that was a top tier song. Guys. I suggest you go check it out. Amazing song might put it to you on your eye.
Speaker 1 (17m 32s): But I saw a tweet, Dante, I saw the tweet that said that, why are you all complaining about $600? And we should be grateful that we're getting anyone don't bite the hand that feeds you don't bite the hand. That feeds You. What about the hand that starving you? I think we should buy that. I think people should stop, you know, used to excepting what they shouldn't except you know that you are worth more than $600 a one-time payment. Mind you. So why shouldn't you fight for what you deserve? I don't think that people should be expecting less than what they deserve.
So anybody that's tweeting don't bite the hand that feeds you definitely don't bite the hand that feeds you by the hand that starving you because that's what our government is, right?
Speaker 2 (18m 11s): Oh that's so give yourself some applause right there because that's exactly right. It's not by the hand that feeds us bite in the hand that is withholding food from you. Okay. Like exactly. Think about it. These people that are debating, whether you deserve $2,000 or not, or rich, they fine. They jobs. Ain't going nowhere. They're okay. They're T they're determining what they think you're worth in a time where our economy is as fragile as it's ever been besides the great depression. And we have a raging pandemic that, you know, we're losing a lot of people to every day.
They're determining what your worth is or what they think that we all were. And I want people who be like, Oh, cause of Justin's put it in your head that I'm radical left or whatever. Listen, listen. He is Republicans. Don't give a fuck about You Democrats on give a fuck about You. This pandemic should show you that your government don't give a fuck about you regardless of party, regardless of color, you have to vote all of these old motherfuckers out and give some people that's on our age, demographic and there to represent us.
Speaker 1 (19m 6s): Push back on that a little bit. I don't think it's about only getting younger people. Yes. A younger people usually are more in tune with what the electorate wants and what they need, but just being young is not good enough for me. Cause you can be young and have trash policies. It's about getting innovative thinkers because you can be 80 years old and being an innovative thinker. Bernie Sanders is a very old, but he seems to be thinking and better ways than some of these politicians that have been around forever or some of the younger ones even. So I'll push back on that a little bit. We just need to get people's best interest in mind is just not being about the corporations and lining your pockets with lobbyists and all this other stuff.
It should be about the people because that's what you know, our government was created for in the first place, by the people, for the people, not by the corporations and for the corporate.
Speaker 2 (19m 51s): What I will say to that about, you know, by the people for the people and everything. They just determined a little later when people started counting as people, you know, women and people of color. But I guess it's okay now. All right guys,
Speaker 1 (20m 4s): He is dragging it's 2021, but it hasn't stopped Dante from dragging everybody.
Speaker 2 (20m 10s): 'cause this country. It wasn't a real democracy in until 1960 for when they pass the civil rights bill. That's why you can say everything you want to know about all men are created equal for the majority of the history of this country. You can not vote unless you are a land owning white male. That's not a democracy. They didn't count black people. As people we can have as three-fifths of a person is not a democracy. So that bill was signed in 1964 in this country. It wasn't a democracy. And then in what, 2013, they gutted the whole fucking bill.
Speaker 6 (20m 37s): So the voting rights act identified parts of the country that had a history of voter discrimination, mostly in the South and set up federal oversight. So if these places we wanted change anything about voting, like enacting a new law or closing polling locations, it first had to get the okay from the us justice department or federal courts that it wasn't discriminatory. The voting rights act did what earlier civil rights laws hadn't. But in 2013, the Supreme court with the majority of Republican appointed judges took on a case about the voting rights act.
They decided that the way the law calculated which States would have that federal oversight was outdated and therefore unconstitutional,
Speaker 1 (21m 19s): Who knows where we are going guys, but it's the 2021. We are trying to be positive. Stay woke. Oh yeah, Let listen. I might have been born yesterday, but I stayed up all night, baby. Trust me. We hear him speak, speak. We are just about ready to get to our main topics of this week. You all have a favorite topic is back. We are doing, what would you do? So if you are a new to the show, what would you do as a topic we do from time to time or actually frequently on the podcast? We are Dante and I, we go through different scenarios that we've come up with and we read them to each other and ask each other.
What would you do in this situation? The reason why I love doing this topic is because in life, sometimes we're thrown curve balls. We don't know how we would handle it. If we were in, you know, somebody else's shoes, because a lot of the problems that we faced in this country is due to not putting ourselves in other people's shoes, to look at the world, through their eyes, through their lens, through their experiences. So on this episode, we're going to do just that. So Dante and I, we came up with our scenarios where we have them ready for you guys. And it's going to be an interesting episode. So I'd be curious to know what you guys think about what we're going to say on this episode.
And if there are scenarios that you all want us to read on air for a future, what would you do? Click the link in the description type or whatever you want to type this and let us know what you think. I do have to say something before you get started. Y'all kind of let me down. I looked at the polling and I really want you to do that. Q and a, but I guess we can save that for another time, but will do these, what would you do have situations like Justin said, type that Lincoln and description, right? And what would you do? Is or questions? My DMS are open. Like I've always told you guys send it to me. I can, you can remain anonymous or our, you can put your name behind it and say what your chest, whatever you want.
I don't care. Just let us know that we loved the interaction. We loved to read it. We loved to talk about that. We love to discuss that and we love to get your feedback on it. So that being said, Dante, do you want to go first? I can go first. I got to fire one for you. Justin what would you do? Dont hypothetically speaking. You're if your sibling was dating your best friend and your siblings was cheating on them. What'd you tell your friend, say that one more time for the people, for the people in the back.
What would you do if your sibling was dating your best friend and your siblings, you knew your sibling was cheating on them. What do you tell your best friend? Hmm. That's that's a very difficult, I'm not a homewrecker. Dante might be a homewrecker, but that's not me. That's not what they call me.
Speaker 3 (23m 54s): Hold up, hold up. This man is coming up, but I can't listen.
Speaker 2 (23m 58s): People have called me everything, but a child of God.
Speaker 3 (24m 0s): Okay. Wow. It'd be yo people,
Speaker 2 (24m 6s): Man. I still got a love for you. Justin
Speaker 3 (24m 8s): I'm being serious. I'm not
Speaker 1 (24m 10s): A homewrecker. Like I do not like to wreck happy homes. I think the, depending on my sibling's reputation, there might be people that have told my best friend that look out for this guy. He's not to be trusted. And I think that you have to heed the warnings. And if my best friend did not heed the warnings and decides to, you know, be with my sibling anyway, that's on them. Because part of being a good friend is allowing your friend to listen to your advice, but also make their own mistakes. Not listening to warnings and not listening to a friend's advice as to making that mistake.
So we're all competent adults and we have a rational thought. So if you want to continue pursuing that relationship, go for it. But that's too much drama. I'm not about the drama. Y'all know me. I do not like to be in the drama. I do not want any parts of it. So to stay out of it and to keep my own peace, I'll keep it to myself. And usually cheaters are sloppy. So if you're willing to cheat on somebody to the point where I know about it, it's probably likely that other people know about it and they're going to do that for me. So that's my opinion on that.
That's what I would do, Dante,
Speaker 3 (25m 13s): What would you do?
Speaker 2 (25m 15s): But really good point about being sloppy? Like how sloppy do you have to be that your spouse has sibling knows about it. And I agree in respect, most of everything that you said. I remember growing up, my dad always told me like when it came to my sisters and my cousin and stuff like, listen, don't get involved in none of that stuff. They go in through it with a guy because it was going to happen. You going to go beat them up and then you want to see them together two days later. And now you want to ask him, cause you beat up her boyfriend. He was, unless they put their hands on them. You ain't got nothing to do with it. My best friend and my siblings. I don't know that that's tough.
I don't know. I know you're asking me my gut reaction. I would approach my sibling and tell them, I'd give them a deadline and say, this is how much time do you have before I have to look out for my friends and have a discussion with them. I'll be like, ah, I would give them an ultimatum. You tell them, or I tell them. But eventually they're going to know because just because you decide to get romantically involved, but somebody doesn't mean you have to lose a friend over it.
Speaker 1 (26m 8s): That's a good, that's good because friendships are important to, and based on the way you approach a certain situation, that friendship could be on the line. And I know it's unfair, but it happens because that kind of stuff is tricky. But
Speaker 3 (26m 22s): Yeah,
Speaker 1 (26m 24s): I was saying out of it, I would say, Hey, look, Hey, take a look at this guy, keeping an eye on him. But that's, as far as I'll go with, you know, overtly saying, Hey, this person's cheating. That's not my place. So that's my siblings duty to figure that out on his or her own.
Speaker 2 (26m 39s): Right. But I guess the question is like, is it worth losing that a friend over? Because eventually they go on to know that you knew
Speaker 1 (26m 46s):
Right, right.
Speaker 2 (27m 23s): I respect everything you just said there. And it makes sense. But one thing I would give some pushback too, is that, you know, I think friends like people who you truly truly consider a friend is the family that you choose. You know, like we all have members of our family net. I mean, and this case is a very specific is we are talking about a sibling. Right. But we all have, our members are a family. We don't fuck with it. We don't like that. We like our friends more than that person. So yeah. It's a difficult situation. And what, what do you guys think about that? What would you do? What would you do if you knew your sibling was cheating on your best friend? Would you tell your friend?
Speaker 1 (27m 54s): Yeah. I'd be curious to know what people think. My first scenario is your girlfriend has friends of the opposite gender. You notice that she and her very attractive male friend FaceTime each other frequently, nothing inappropriate is ever said in your presence, but you were aware that they face time, even when you're not around, would this make you uncomfortable? How would you react? Is there a limit on friendship? What would you do?
Speaker 2 (28m 18s): Do I'm a firm believer in a shoulder to cry on, becomes a to ride on bro. So that man, it was just biding his time until I fuck up is real important. People are understanding that love is not a possession, right? Like you do not own somebody because you love them because you date them or because you're married or whatever the case may be. No, it was not a possession. So if they have a friend, people who are allowed to have friends, if you were uncomfortable with that friendship, you should be man enough or woman enough to go to your partner and say, I'm uncomfortable.
Here's why I'm uncomfortable and lay it all out for them. Because if they respect you enough for if your relationship, the communication is good enough, you guys could talk about it and figure out a solution to it. That's not ME size of your question. Yes. It would make me uncomfortable that you FaceTime and some dude all the time, like what was going on here? Like this is my art or what
Speaker 1 (29m 10s): W what is to be uncomfortable about. They are just friends, friends, right?
Speaker 2 (29m 15s): Just friends, that many people that start. How many people listen to this podcast right now, it started off as just friends. And then you ended up inside of somebody or with somebody inside of you.
Speaker 1 (29m 26s): Is that guys and girls and straight relationships, can't be just friends.
Speaker 2 (29m 30s): No, I'm not saying that. I'm just saying, like, we would have a conversation about it. I need to know the backstory here. That's doing your due diligence
Speaker 1 (29m 37s): Is innocent. You know, there are allowed to have friends at the opposite sex for sure. A hundred percent. And they can like hang out and like do dinners and lunches and stuff. And that's fine. Right?
Speaker 2 (29m 47s): I ain't going to never tell my spouse or my friends who they can and can't hang with a perfect example. And Rica got a homie now. I'm not cool with 'cause. This man did me dirty before, but I ain't never said Enrique like a man, because you, my brother, like you can't fuck with this guy no more. Cause I don't fuck with him. No, he know what the situation is. I just told them, this is what went down. You play him the way you want to play him. Just know that he was capable of doing X, Y, and Z. That's just how I look at it. So I, ain't never going to tell nobody they can't be friends with somebody, but yes.
If your secure enough and your relationship. Sure. Yeah. Go out to lunch with somebody. I go have dinner with somebody. That's fine. Whatever interesting. But, but like I'm secure enough in my relationships and myself, that that's okay. Because at the end of the day, if you cheat is over, you know what I mean? Like, so you made a decision for me. It's it's all good.
Speaker 1 (30m 37s): Interesting. I feel like a lot of people wouldn't have that opinion. They would feel uncomfortable because it's like, what is it that you're FaceTiming with this other person that you can't FaceTime with me about your career? And that's all it comes down to communication and it comes, it comes down to how strong your relationship is. Why are you paranoid about every single person that this person is talking to you, you should be secure enough to understand that, you know, my partner would never cheat. So I have nothing to worry about. We're all allowed to have friends. That's it?
Speaker 2 (31m 5s): So that's where your that's what you were saying. It is.
Speaker 1 (31m 8s): Yeah. That's where my stance is. I think it comes down to just being sincere in your relationship. But I think the insecure relationship stuff like that would make one or the other like, feel uncomfortable. That's interesting. Cause if I had, you know, somebody else on this show, or they might have a different opinion, or even the people listening are like, Aww, that can't be me. I can't be ME. And if that can't be you, I want to know, type it in and click the link in the description and let me know your opinion on that. What would you do scenario?
Speaker 2 (31m 34s): Alright. Justin what would you do if you were in the military and you were sent to fight and a conflict you didn't believe in, or you 100% disagreed with,
Speaker 1 (31m 43s): So basically asking me what would I do if I got drafted? Sure. Yup. That, let me just say this before I get in the hot water, I love our troops. I love our military and service people. I think that what they do is very brave because a lot of people wouldn't voluntarily do that. So the fact that there are so many people in this country who go out and serve voluntarily, I think is something to be honored. And I think it's something to be applauded because a lot of people wouldn't do that. So I'll just say that first and foremost, but when it comes to war, I'm not built for that.
I'm a lover, not a fighter. I'm a lover, not a fighter. I love the honesty. It's true. There's just not something I would do. The thing with. What would you do? Scenarios is that there are rules. We have to answer the question and we can't say, I don't know. I have to enter this question. Dang. I think that I probably wouldn't pass whatever test. I probably wouldn't whatever. And then she'll test, you have to go through to even get into military. So that would be my out.
But I think if I was drafted, you know, I don't have a choice to do I, you know, I can run away. I can hold my breath and go in to active duty and fight for the country. It's complicated. It's complicated because if you know history like the Vietnam war, a lot of black people were drafted. And I think that black people at that time represented don't quote me on this percent of those fighting and the Vietnam war. That's not fair. So I think black people in general have a complicated history with war and with being drafted.
So the fact that I got drafted, I would already feel some type of way about, but I wouldn't support it. Cause I don't support unnecessary Wars. I have no control over that. So it is what it is and I'd have to do that.
Speaker 2 (33m 27s): Okay. Got you to answer my own. What Would You Do it comes down the two things. One is I drafted it to that volunteer. So if I'm a volunteer, I knew what I signed up for. And I knew I would have to go against things that maybe aren't putting the right direction of my moral compass. So you have to go along with it. I was drafted. I mean, Muhammad Ali got drafted last five years of his career because he refused to go fighting the war. He didn't believe in, you know, if you're going to ask me to kill an innocent kids and things like that, my relationship with my soul is a little more important than that stuff.
So the man I am today, I would like to think that I'd stand on my morals and say, I didn't sign up for this. You forced this upon me. Cool. I'm going to sit this one out, do what you will. A good, I think that's a good opinion. That's a good opinion. If it's something that truly don't believe in and disagree with a hundred percent,
Speaker 1 (34m 17s): I know that's a different caveat that complicates my answer. If it's a war, that's unjustified. If it's a useless war in, you know, thousands of people are going to die because of it. If I don't believe it, or I'm not going to do it, call me a trader, call me whatever. But I think that our country has fought a lot of Wars, the Iraq war, for example, I'm not going to go deep into it, but that was a war that was based on false intelligence. A lot of people lost their life due to that war and it was unfair. So if I was in that situation, I would sit it out. If it was possible for me to do that because if I don't believe in it, I don't believe in it.
And I think my values of what I stand for it is more important than killing, possibly innocent people that had no say in us invading their country. That's just how I see it
Speaker 2 (34m 57s): Told you all we get in deep. We'd got some heavy hitters
Speaker 1 (34m 60s): And speaking of heavy hitters, this next one is a heavy hitter, right?
Speaker 2 (35m 2s): Are you ready? Are you all got to get ready when you stay ready? All right,
Speaker 1 (35m 6s): One day your best friend comes to you and tells you that he needs to confide in you. He says that something has been weighing heavy on his heart and he trusts you and wants to tell you, he tells you that five years ago, outside of BARR, he got into a fight and beat a man to the point where he killed him. No one was around and this death has remained unsolved in your community for five years. What would you do?
Speaker 2 (35m 32s): So this is a sort of like that Phil Collin song in the air of the night, right? Like you, somebody watch, somebody get killed type thing. So let's talk about this from a rational standpoint, before we get to the emotions, if we confess as a murderer to you and you don't report that, like you could get charged with conspiracy and that is an accomplice. I know I'm pretty sure. So there is a lot of legal ramifications there. I wouldn't turn my best friend in because I'm not built that way. If there's a lot of people that are built that way, but I wouldn't turn them in.
I would tell them what I think they should do. And what I think you should do is turn yourself in because regardless of what ha what that person did, right? There is a mother that is missing her and her son or her daughter. There is a family that's hurting and that's in pain. That's what I have empathy for. Like when people die over a stupid reasons that I don't feel bad for that person, I feel bad for the family that has effects. So I would let them have five of them and get it off their chest. And I would talk to them about, you know, Hey, here's the possible options you may have, but I ain't going to snitch on them.
Speaker 1 (36m 34s): A lot of people get friendship screwed up. A lot of people think that friendship is all about protecting your friend. But I think being a good friend is also about holding your friends accountable, telling them when they're wrong, telling them when they messed up. And I think I would be a good friend. If I was honest with my friend, Hey, you did something bad. There's a family's hurting. You should do the right thing. You know, take accountability for your actions and you know, suffer the consequences. It's hard. I know nobody wants to hear that, but it's the truth.
We are an adult. You know, when we do something, sometimes we face consequences for it. It's not fair to do something, commit a crime, kill somebody and then run away and never face your consequences. That's not fair to that family. And your also not being fair to yourself. That's not fair. What if that was your loved one that you knew somebody out there New that they killed somebody, but they are keeping it secret because they don't want to go to prison. You would do everything in your power to find that person and bring them to justice. So I think because of that, you have to be accountable for your actions. Then you have to turn yourself in.
So I think part of being a good friend is also being honest and holding them accountable. Otherwise I'm not a good friend. If I'm lying to you, if I'm trying to protect you, that's not being a good friend because two wrongs don't make a right. Everybody knows right and wrong. And the right thing to do is to turn yourself in. So that's what I would tell my friend. He might not want to hear that, but it is what it is. That's my truth. And that's what I would tell him. But what he does is another thing, but that's not a part of this, right?
Speaker 2 (38m 1s): It's not, they don't got nothing to do with me when you decide to do. Cause I didn't do it. You have a grown ass man. You have free will ME and all of my friends have an agreement. I made it with them. I will tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear. That's a promise. And I want you to do the same because if you, my friend and we love each other, you going to be able to tell me some things that I might not want to know, or you have an opinion about ME or something that I did that, you know, I might disagree with what you love me enough to get me that constructive criticism or tell me when I'm wrong. And I'm down for that. Like, that's the true form of love and respect.
So I would be, I'd be up front and my best friend tell him like, yeah, what you did was wrong. And there is a family out there hurting right now. And what you decided to do is up to you, but I'm just giving you my opinion on it.
Speaker 1 (38m 45s): I agree. I agree. I think that's a great point. Some people don't want to hear the truth and you as a good friend, you have to be willing to tell them things that they don't want to hear it.
Speaker 2 (38m 53s): Right. All right. I guess that means it's my turn. Now, what would you do if it's your wedding day? And the moment comes where whoever's officiating, the wedding says, if anybody objects speak now or forever, hold your piece and somebody objects, what would you do?
Speaker 1 (39m 15s): It, it, it would depend on what they're objecting for.
Speaker 2 (39m 18s): Let me interrupt you. I want to give you three different scenarios. And first scenario your mama interrupts.
Speaker 1 (39m 24s): Mm. If my mom interrupts, I don't know. I would take, I love my parents, but I would take everything that they say with a grain of salt, because I'll be honest about my parents. My parents have told my siblings that if we marry somebody that's white, that they wouldn't support the marriage, that they wouldn't come to the marriage because they're all about us marrying somebody within our culture. So let's say the person that I'm marrying happens to be white. My parents would not support that. So that's the reason why my mom is objecting. Then I would take it with the grain of salt. 'cause she's not coming from the greatest place.
If that makes sense. That's the only way I could imagine my mom objecting if she really does not like one marrying, but that's me just being honest with you.
Speaker 2 (40m 5s): Okay. Now what if it wasn't an ex? That was the objector, right?
Speaker 1 (40m 9s): My X would not be on my way. It's would not be on my wedding. Why are you at my wedding? And a lot of Africans would be at the wedding. People who are, of course you will be escorted out. Okay. I don't think that would ever happen to me, but, or people would laugh about it. Cause who actually objects during the wedding, I've never been a part of a wedding where anybody objected.
Speaker 2 (40m 30s): I would like to be there for one, as long as it's not somebody that I'm close to, like have it's like, you know, I'm going to my girlfriends date to a wedding of some people like maybe she went to like, I don't know, high school, which, or some shit like that. So like, we really don't really care that much. And because it's an interesting, like what happens now? Like as somebody daddy goes to stand up and try and fight you or something like that, what goes on there?
Speaker 1 (40m 51s): Because you ask me for a trouble, if your doing that, that's supposed to be a happy day. And I supposed to be a day where your celebrating love and matrimony and all that good stuff. And you're over here objecting. You better have a good reason why you're objecting because you are ruining a happy home. Again. Don't do that.
Speaker 2 (41m 7s): I don't know if that, if that's necessarily a bad thing, like maybe the spirit has moved. You have such a way that you feel that strongly, that you think this person's making a mistake or that, Hey, if it's an ex that you love this person so much, that you can believe that you guys are so amazed that you do this, who knows it may be. That's what it took for that person to hear you put yourself out there like that in front of you. And then people that say, Hey, look, I don't give a fuck about nobody else in this room, but ME and you, you made a mistake
Speaker 1 (41m 32s): That was kind of romantic out to you
Speaker 2 (41m 37s): Too. You know,
Speaker 1 (41m 39s): A lot of people who would not find that romantic,
Speaker 2 (41m 41s): That's not true. You ever seen all those movies like wedding Crashers and notebook as shit like that, man, that girl is a w listening. People would love for someone like that to happen in them. If they were not married and the person that they really love for the drama, I'll be right there putting all that shit on a snap.
Speaker 1 (41m 57s): You know? Cause wedding's are, to be honest, wedding's are boring. It's the after party. That's the fun part of it. It's not the most eventful.
Speaker 2 (42m 5s): Oh yeah. It's all about the reception man and getting fucked up. What is a great parties. They really are.
Speaker 1 (42m 12s): All right. Next scenario is speaking of weddings on the day of your wedding, you find out that your partner had an affair. When you confront her about it, she tells you that the fling is over and you believe them, the wedding is paid for and your guests have begun to arrive. What would you do?
Speaker 2 (42m 27s): Listen, I didn't let people down before in my life. I guess you don't want to get the part. I mean, everything already paid for you to still a party if he wants to, but it ain't going to be a party and celebrate in no fucking marriage. I'll tell you that. That's
Speaker 1 (42m 35s): So selfish. That's so, so far
Speaker 2 (42m 38s): That day was about you. It is.
Speaker 1 (42m 40s): How about you? But a lot of people have bought plane tickets. A lot of people have been fluid out or whatever, and they're are arriving. You know,
Speaker 2 (42m 47s): We're going to talk to that. ON faithful motherfucker about why you wasted that money then.
Speaker 1 (42m 51s): So what do you see? Are you, what are you going to do to make an announcement? Say so sorry. The wedding is canceled. People are going to be confused. Wouldn't you rather just pretend and go on as usual, get your gifts and then call it off. After a while.
Speaker 2 (43m 3s): Year crazy. Listen, divorces are expensive. Half thinking about everything you own. And right now Justin now you got to split up a half of that. You're insane. No, you don't listen. Cause you didn't sign a prenup. If you really love somebody, you sign a prenup. Are you asking me? You know, man,
Speaker 1 (43m 24s): Are you going to wait? Or are you going to sign a prenup?
Speaker 2 (43m 27s): Oh God, shit.
Speaker 1 (43m 29s): As a matter are you answer the question or are you going to sign up for, you know,
Speaker 2 (43m 33s): Nice. I ended up a prenup man. Oh, are you serious? Yeah, I got good lawyers. If God forbid, if anything ever happen, we could settle it. But nah, I was just joking. I'm being the character for you guys. Listen. If, if she told me, Hey, it was a one-time thing. It happened months ago, blah, blah, blah. It never happened again. And then this wedding is already paid for and people already arrive in like, Oh, this is one of those things where the old Dante would punch me in the face right now. Oh, I guess I gotta give you a chance.
I've got to give you a chance. It hurts to say that, but it gets like, I get a chance. I don't know how I might change my opinion tomorrow. This one was tough.
Speaker 1 (44m 12s): I'm dead. I'm dead. What is, what is your next scenario?
Speaker 2 (44m 17s): You didn't answer the question.
Speaker 1 (44m 18s): Oh, I would. I would go on with this ceremony with, in the back of my mind. I know, I know I would receive all the gifts. Make everybody think that it's a happy situation. And then like a month later. Cause the thing is just because you have a wedding ceremony doesn't mean all the documentation has been signed. So when we get to the 11th hour, I'm not obviously signing any documentation. So sorry. That's your decision to cheat. So you deal with the consequences. We have the ceremony and whenever people ask what happened, why aren't you all together? I'll simply explain you cheated and I'll move on.
Speaker 2 (44m 50s): I know you have a good point because none of that shit is official until you go into the back after the wedding and signed that marriage license and to have some money to witness it. So you could fake the buck the whole time. Yeah. I'm with you. I'm with you on a day. This guy thinks this guy thinks I told you I can accept When Justin is right.
Speaker 1 (45m 7s): That's true. And I'm right. A lot of the time, so. Wow. Wow.
Speaker 2 (45m 12s): Yeah. Just like he would be putting them fucking crickets behind you.
Speaker 1 (45m 15s): I don't lengthen the pauses either. What? You hear, what you hear y'all all right. Whatever, whatever.
Speaker 2 (45m 22s): All right, my next, what would you do? What would you do if you had a child and on their fifth birthday or your spouse told you that, that kid wasn't yours, what would you do?
Speaker 1 (45m 34s): I always say, I think this is a cop out answer that I would never be in this situation, but for the sake of the podcast, I'll answer it anyway. That's a, that's a tough predicament to be. And I know, I know a lot of people out there have maybe experienced that. Some of you all are listening right now. I don't know what I would do. First of all, the relationship is over. But I think just the shame and embarrassment of it would really eat at me. Cause my parents, Oh, you know, whenever you have kids, your parents love your grandchildren so much.
And just the pain that it would cause my parents to know that that's not my child. I think that's unforgivable. It's embarrassing. It's unforgivable. Depending on the circumstance of me finding out if there was a mistake, the end of the nurses switched out the babies. That's one thing. If it's a love baby, From infidelity. That's even worse. So it depends on what scenario it is.
Speaker 2 (46m 29s): Oh, the scenario for this, as you got cheated on, like if there was something that a baby's got Swiss, you can go get your real kid. This is going to be some weird shit, but you can go get your real kid. This is like, Hey, this is a love kid.
Speaker 1 (46m 40s): That's a movie, right? The script. Right? The script. But yeah, I mean I think the logical option is to divorce. You brought somebody into this world with the intention that that's your kid, you love this, like your child now, what do you do? Do you discard the child? They call you daddy. They love you. They think that you're the father. What do you supposed to do at that point? You know, give the child out for adoption. Do you continue loving that child? I don't know. First of all, divorce would be the first thing that I would do. And then my next step would be figuring out what to do with the kid.
I'm, I'm sure that I can file some lawsuits and figure some stuff out and have whoever is the real father pay child support and raise that child because that's your child. And it's just unfortunate because I already have attachment to this kid and that's what complicates it. Even further. There are calling me daddy, and then I'm pushing them off to be raised by that. They don't know that they've never met that they might not like, it's an unfortunate, it's unfortunate, but this is a movie. This is a movie because I started doing, trying to figure out what I would do in this situation.
I don't know. I don't know lawyers would be involved. A divorce would happen. And I would feel for the child because in a way it is my son. So I don't know Dante, this is your question. What would you do?
Speaker 2 (47m 57s): The relationship is over. And I am not in that cause life anymore. And I will be selling you for money that I have spent on this kid. Listen, I understand that you've known this kid for five years. You've loved it as your own and everything like that. But like you said, it is the ultimate betrayal that was bestowed upon you. And also everybody that loves you has gotten, has grown to know and love that child and that embarrassment that you are feeling that hurt, that you were feeling. I don't think that it could ever be the same and I don't think it could ever go back. There are lines that can be crossed. And I think that's a line crosser.
So like, I'll see you in court and I wish you and that kid the best of luck.
Speaker 1 (48m 32s): Yeah. And that's a terrible thing to do to somebody. Kanye had a famous line and a song, gold Digger, 18 years, 18 years. I forgot the rest of the lyrics. I put a clip
Speaker 7 (48m 45s):
Speaker 1 (48m 59s): That's, that's messed up. And for anybody that's ever had to experience something like that, I'm curious to know what you did and how you handle that situation. For me, you, it would be hard to automatically stop loving that child. Like it's my own, but it's not my child. And having to pay all this money to support a kid. That's not mine. I don't think that's something that I would want to do cause kids or expensive, but it's a weight. Like you said, I think the worst thing you can do to somebody is a waste of your time. I wasted five years, pour it into this kid. And I wasted years with whoever I'm with. We might've had a kid for five years, but we might have been together longer than that.
And this whole time, I couldn't trust you when I thought I could. I think that's unforgivable. And that's a terrible situation to be in.
Speaker 2 (49m 38s): There's a special place in hell for you. If you knew that for five years.
Speaker 1 (49m 41s): Yeah. My next scenario is your best friend's kid confides in you and lets you know that his father has been badly beating him. You would never expect for your best friend to treat his son like this. And you were a completely shocked by this information. Do you confront the father and risk him taking his anger out on the son? Or do you keep it to yourself? What would you do?
Speaker 2 (50m 5s): Nah, I'm going to go put my hands on my best friend. Simple as that. You're not going to be abused in this kid that you brought in the world that you are tasked with loving and providing for that kid. And it has to be here and you ain't going to, I'm not want to hear about no abuse of this child. 'cause if this kid came to me and said some other man, besides his dad who was putting his hands on with me and my best friend, we're going to talk about this and we're going to go and beat the shit out of that man. And had that handled. Now you are that man. That's putting your hands on him. So no I'm not standing for that. We're going to have a conversation is probably what a result of me putting my hands on you and your kid comes back and tells me again that after me and you have talked about this and you put your hands off and then guess what?
You have a responsibility to be a dad. There's to many people walking around here, what week that is. And they live right now anyway. And there's to many people that don't have that ease in their lives because a dad chose not to be there. I'm not cool with that. That kid is I'm going to call child protective services. If you put on your hands on that kid after me and you handle what we got to handle after I've confronted you once about it. I don't respect that.
Speaker 1 (51m 2s): I think I would do the same thing. If I'm your best friend, I can talk to you and put you in your place and tell you right and tell you wrong. It may be interesting to know the reason why he's doing that because nothing is ever black and white, but still I think that the important thing to do is to protect the child because a child and asked to be born and all the child is trying to do is to live life and enjoy their life. And the fact that their own father is brutally beating them. I think that's terrible. I would definitely have some words with my friend. And if that continues, the law would have to get involved at that point.
Right? But my question for you is whenever you have your kids, are you gonna beat them? And did you get beat growing up,
Speaker 2 (51m 39s): Beating and abusing are two completely different things. You know, I got discipline for sure. That's how we learn not to do shit no more man. Like what do you know what, like it's your kid. You do everyone to have respect that you don't want to be them. You don't want to beat them. Am I going to make my kids not, ain't going to hate me. They mom can handle that day. She could be the speaker. He doesn't want to beat them. We've got a flip a coin. My dad never, ever put his hands on me. He was not the ones that are disciplined. ME in a physical way. My mom gave me Beatons but my dad had never had to put his hands on me.
So I guess growing up in that role and you know, I guess that that's kind of what I would, how I want my kids to be raised, you know? And like I didn't get beat all Willy nilly about, you know, my mom had a bad day. She came home and beat me now, man, that's crazy. Like it was for discipline reasons. Like you got to find a school got suspended. Cool. You know, or I talk back, you know, or it was disrespectful. You know what I mean? Like there's reasons behind the stuff. It's not somebody that just beat in on you to beat on you. And that's not cool. I don't condone that. But beating as disciplining and your kid learn a lesson.
Yeah. I believe in it. It made me who I am. Today it builds character.
Speaker 1 (52m 46s): Do you think your girlfriend would be your kids? You
Speaker 2 (52m 48s): Know, she soft. We'll have to have her talk about it.
Speaker 1 (52m 51s): Okay. So that's the thing. So you're going to be raising a child that is never going to get beat ever.
Speaker 2 (52m 57s): No, not to say if it came down to it, I would have to step in and do it if it came down to it. But like they will be disciplined because I'd rather them get discipline at home that somebody on the streets, what they ask you because they didn't get the proper disciplining at home or who come from somewhere that I love you. There's a lot of people around here that are going around talking to all of that shit, popping off that shit. You could tell they ain't never been punched in the mouth or you could tell they had never had discipline at home. And that's why somebody in the real world is going to punch them in the mouth. Yeah. I think it
Speaker 1 (53m 26s): Comes down to parenting. You have to instill lessons within your children and teach them otherwise, somebody else will teach them. I'm I will say that the African and Nigerian culture or all of us got bead, it's a rare to find somebody that did not get spanked growing up. Even though like, I felt like sometimes when I got spanked it wasn't justified. I do think that sometimes it's NECESSARY and that doesn't mean you have to do it all the time. But sometimes even once I know some people that got Be once and they were on the straight and narrow ever since, sometimes it takes, you know, a scare or too for you to realize consequences and do the right thing.
I will say, I can get into touchy territory where people think that beading your child is a quick solution. It's not because it can lead to resentment. You don't want your kid hating you because instead of teaching them right from wrong and sitting them down and having a conversation with them, you resort to just spanking and beating a lot of African parents do that. And it has the Thanks on our relationships with our parents. A lot of us don't talk to our parents. Like we should, we don't have open communication. Like we just don't, you know, have that kind of relationship. And it's unfortunate. So whenever I raised my kids, I'm going to make sure that they can talk to me about anything.
Because even to this day, my parents have never gave me the sex talk. They have never sat me down about anything like that because, you know, I guess this is uncomfortable with, within our culture to talk about stuff like that. But I think those conversations are important to have and stuff like that is unfortunate because you should be able to talk to your kid about that or upon other things, you should have open communication. Otherwise your kids are going to be hiding stuff from you. You know, a lot of African kids became good liars and good hiders because you know, they w they grew up in this environment where they weren't able to be open and honest with their parents.
So the hit some stuff and no kids should have a relationship with their parent's like that. So that's the lesson that I'll learn. And I'd be interested to know what you guys think too.
Speaker 2 (55m 16s): And I think that's a good point, right? Like, it's not like, Hey, first resort is going to be to beat, beat your kid. No, I'm a firm believer in words and communication. So you're gonna let them know what they did was wrong while it was wrong in what the consequences are for the next time. If they decided to do it, you, you know what it's all about teaching them and making them better people and knowing right from wrong. You a child is a blank canvas. You have to instill morals and values inside of them. Yes, sir. Yes, sir. What would you do if you sent news to someone and you saw them posted online
Speaker 1 (55m 47s): For the sake of this podcast, I'll answer it, but I would never be in this situation because I don't send nudes, especially not with my face. And I'm glad they don't have any tattoos. Dontay is unfortunate for you. I, I would never be in a situation cause I don't send them, but what would I do? I have found them plastered on the internet. I would take action because I think that's called revenge porn. Even if they didn't do it vindictively, why are you posting my stuff in public? That's messed up and I would take action.
And if there's a way that they can retract that from the internet, please do. But everybody should know. And its kind of scary where technology is that whatever we do online, it stays forever. You don't know how many people are screenshotting certain things, something can be removed, but 10 people have already screen-shotted it. And then they are sending it to all of these other people. So is this network of information that stands out in the matter of seconds and you have no control over that. What you can control is not taking news or only sending them to people that you trust.
And that's the scary thing these days. So that's the reason why I don't engage and stuff like that because I don't want anything that I do online to ever come back and bite me. And if you're going to do it, make sure your face and your identifying tattoos or not included.
Speaker 2 (57m 2s): You brought up a very interesting point about revenge for and everything. I think they need to make the laws way more clear on that because in the beginning of when sex and it became a thing, it was like, Hey somebody, I sent you something. It has your property. Now, regardless if it's them, it's your property because they shared it with you is what the law was. And now they are reforming these laws and giving people more rights on there. You know, revenge porn, like you said, but I have an interesting question to spin off of what you just said there, let's say you are subscribed to somebody is only fans are Patrion and you share that content.
Is that fair? Is it like stealing songs from Limewire at that point? Because you're sharing it with people.
Speaker 1 (57m 41s): I think it is an intellectual property
Speaker 2 (57m 44s): And your body be intellectual property. This is interesting. This is interesting.
Speaker 1 (57m 49s): It is your body. This is an interesting conversation and your body is your body. But the thing with Patrion or only fans is that people pay to see that. So if you are taking that and posting that stuff online, that's theft, that's somebody, else's stuff that you're stealing.
Speaker 2 (58m 6s): If you paid for it, as long as you're not profiting off of it. I don't know if that stuff.
Speaker 1 (58m 10s): So if you just like screen recorded, is that the left? Is that right?
Speaker 2 (58m 14s): No. I mean, I just want to start it in a broader conversation about what would be considered that I didn't think about the scenarios that you laid out. Like if you're paying for it as, and you distribute, it is as long as you're not receiving any money for it. I don't think that Steph you pay for it.
Speaker 1 (58m 27s): No, no it is that it is that because let's take bootleg movies. For example, a lot of peoples see a movie uploaded too, a boot, like a website. They're not making money from it, but they stole that movie and plastered it on the internet for people to see that's piracy, that's piracy and that's illegal. So you don't have to be making money off of something for it. Not to be illegal,
Speaker 2 (58m 50s): Man. That's just call it a hookup. You know that,
Speaker 1 (58m 57s): Oh my, my, my younger listeners, the day's of burning CDs. You all have no idea what that is. People did that back in the day, that's piracy Ashanti's album would come out. People would go in and make copies of it and sell it at barbershops and stuff. People did it all the time. That stuff doesn't happen as much anymore. But that's funny. That is piracy. It's your body intellectual property is your, is, is your Is. Well, that's an interesting though, because porn stars though, see, this is what I'm saying.
The porn companies own those videos. So if you're taking that and posting it somewhere else that your beef is not what a porn star, your beef is with the head of the porn agency that owns that video.
Speaker 2 (59m 40s): Yes. I don't know. That's an a, and this is interesting. If anybody out there has an only fans or a patron or anything like that, and you know more about this than we do, please let us know because I'm generally interested in that question now.
Speaker 1 (59m 51s): So the guys, this is going to be our last scenario. This has been fun so far, but here we go. And Dante, you meet the love of your life and you want to marry her. The only caveat is that she's Muslim. And she asked that if you want to marry her, you must convert to Islam. What would you do?
Speaker 2 (1h 0m 7s): Excuse me for being a little vulgar crude here, guys. But there is not a vagina on earth that would make me give up my Jesus. I'm going to tell you right now some about the name of Jesus. It is the sweetest name. I know. I know. Listen, you can, if we, if you love me, if you'd have love in my life and you love me. See I becoming on here, I'm getting heated right now. I have been coming out here to talk about love and like that. They don't love me. That ain't for me. If you love me the way you say you love me, then I'll get to convert the shit. It neither do you.
You can worship. You can worship the way you want to. Or you can believe in Muhammad is the last prophet. And I can believe in Jesus and we can, Let still love each other and have a happy life together. But giving me an ultimatum, listen, baby, I ain't choosing you over my salvation. That's just what it comes down to for me.
Speaker 1 (1h 0m 57s): Well, people do that. People do that. Aren't you praying to the same God. So what does it matter? Anyway, if you have different customs and different things that you wear, why does it matter? Love is love. And if you truly love for you to convert because plenty of people are in a bullshit. No, it's not a plaintiff. Do you know? There's a lot of this is actually a common thing. A lot of people actually convert to their spouses. Religion. Once they get married,
Speaker 2 (1h 1m 18s): We were talking like Catholic to Methodist or a Pisco paleon to Presbyterian you talking about Muslim from Protestant to Muslim. This is Islamophobia. Co don't do that to me. That's not true at all that just because I want to keep my religion means that I'm going to sound a phobic. That's not true at all. I believe you have the right to worship, whatever God you want and worship in whatever way that you want. But I have that same, right. And if I don't want to convert and give up my God and what I've worshiped my whole life, that's my choice. If you don't like it, you don't gotta be with me.
I will find somebody else
Speaker 1 (1h 1m 52s): There. You have it guys. And there you have it. There's plenty of fishing to see. And if that's your ultimatum and you're uncomfortable with it, move on and it might be hard. You will find somebody else. You find a good Christian person to marry and you'll live happily ever after.
Speaker 2 (1h 2m 7s): You might find someone, but you will never find another. You remember that, right?
Speaker 1 (1h 2m 11s): Otherwise. Yeah. And that's that, that's our opinion on that. This has been a fun episode. I always loved doing. What would you do? Scenarios. Dante, what did you think? We learned some things about each other.
Speaker 2 (1h 2m 22s): It was more fun than I thought it would be. I thought I would like a Q and a episode more, but this was fun because I want you all to understand. We didn't share these with each other before we got on here. So it was all genuine first time reactions. And I think that's what makes it entertaining. It gives you more of a raw and real episode, raw and real. He said, wow, Oh my gosh, this guy's heads in a gutter. No, it was,
Speaker 1 (1h 2m 49s): Was it wasn't the, your head is in the gut. I wasn't even thinking about that. I was just repeating what you said. Your head is in the gutter, but you guys, this has been a fun episode. I love doing these episodes because it's important to think about things from a different perspective. How would you react if you were thrust in these different scenarios, but yeah, I think that's about it for this episode. I'll always say, if you want your opinion hurt on this show, use that link in the description to send us anonymous questions, to follow the Instagram, follow us on social media.
All of that is linked in the description and subscribe, tell you a meme. I say it on every episode, your P Pod Wawa, ya Nanna. Tell them all to listen to this show or tell them to subscribe. If you're listening on Spotify, hit the following button and share the show. It's important to enjoy the show. But also if you want other people to know about the show, feel free to share it. Like Dante always says sharing the podcast is like sharing music with a friend. There is a tight bond. There is to do the same with this podcast. Any last words, Dante,
Speaker 2 (1h 3m 49s): I know both of us would love to hear what you guys thought about some of these. What would you do? And tell us what you would do in those situations. Cause I'm ready for somebody to come at me. All types of sideways. I'd be like, you were a bitch ass nigga. Cause you were like, you know,
Speaker 1 (1h 4m 4s): This episode is so funny.
Speaker 2 (1h 4m 6s): I'm ready for it. So get at us love to hear y'all feed back all the time. Whether it was good, bad, indifferent. I love to hear your feedback.
Speaker 1 (1h 4m 13s): Yes sir. So with that being said, we know a vaccine is on the horizon, continue to wear your mask, stays safe and maybe in 20, by the end or the middle part of 2021, I didn't even have to say that anymore, but you never know. So continue to wear your mask, continue to stay safe, continue to share the show with that being said, we'll catch you guys on the next time.
Speaker 0 (1h 4m 32s):